bullies - conclusion
It's me again - Gypsy. When I first decided to do my guest appearance on drift I had no idea I would decide to do a series. Well I guess whoever has been keeping up with this may wish to know how everything turned out in the end. So here goes...
In the end Big Mike got 15 days Solitary for the two fights. He got out of Solitary and the next day Ashly and he got back together. So once again they are a couple. I've seen Big Mike. He shook my hand and told me "thank you" for stopping him; told me that sometimes he scares himself and can't control his anger. I just looked him in the eye and I told him you don't hurt the one you love. I told him if you love that boy keep your hands off him period. All he did was look at me. We have not talked since that day nor has Ashly spoken to me. I think maybe Ashly is ashamed of the fact that he went back to Big Mike after I saved him. Who knows?
Sometimes I wonder why I can't seem to mind my own business. I mean, every time I stop a fight it seems like it doesn't do any good. Who am I to try to save the world? I'm in prison, just as they are, but it's like there are two of me and when I see somebody who does not wish to fight being made to fight I step up and say to hell with it, "He does not wish to fight you, but I will." Sometimes the fight ends there, sometimes I have to fight. And I really can't stand to fight.
Ashly went back to Big Mike and I'll never for the life of me understand why. I just hope next time he doesn't hurt Ashly as he tried before 'cause you don't hurt the one you love
Gypsy
In the end Big Mike got 15 days Solitary for the two fights. He got out of Solitary and the next day Ashly and he got back together. So once again they are a couple. I've seen Big Mike. He shook my hand and told me "thank you" for stopping him; told me that sometimes he scares himself and can't control his anger. I just looked him in the eye and I told him you don't hurt the one you love. I told him if you love that boy keep your hands off him period. All he did was look at me. We have not talked since that day nor has Ashly spoken to me. I think maybe Ashly is ashamed of the fact that he went back to Big Mike after I saved him. Who knows?
Sometimes I wonder why I can't seem to mind my own business. I mean, every time I stop a fight it seems like it doesn't do any good. Who am I to try to save the world? I'm in prison, just as they are, but it's like there are two of me and when I see somebody who does not wish to fight being made to fight I step up and say to hell with it, "He does not wish to fight you, but I will." Sometimes the fight ends there, sometimes I have to fight. And I really can't stand to fight.
Ashly went back to Big Mike and I'll never for the life of me understand why. I just hope next time he doesn't hurt Ashly as he tried before 'cause you don't hurt the one you love
Gypsy
posted by nash at 12:22 PM
3 Comments:
Hi Gypsy,
Welcome back to “Drift” and thanks for concluding the saga of Big Mike and Ashley. It sounds like a classic case of codependence going on between these two guys. Ashley, the dependent or needy party, may have emotional or physical problems that are seemingly impossible for him to surmount. Big Mike, the codependent, seems to be exhibiting behavior that controls, makes excuses for, pities and takes other actions to perpetuate the obviously needy party’s condition, because of his desire to be needed and fear of doing anything that would change the relationship. You’ll probably never understand all the complex reasons that Big Mike and Ashley continue their relationship; they probably don’t comprehend their codependent need for one another either.
From your writings, prison appears to be a microcosm of human nature, no doubt intensified by the close living quarters and the repressed anger of the inmates. I hope you’re able to avoid getting in the midst of any more fights while you’re incarcerated. The next time you witness a brawl starting, take a few deep breaths and walk away…
Are you going to contribute more to Nash’s blog in the future?
I'm so nonviolent it's a disease. Because I do think when it comes to defending the weak, it's justifiable, and there are times when I think I should have been willing to use it, like defending my sister in 6th grade.
It seems you are never the aggressor, so you can give yourself a break.
However I managed to do a 9-month stint without resorting to violence once, and 90% of the time the fights I witnessed took two to tango. So stay out of it when they aggressee is actually provoking it for the attention. Sounds like Ashly may be a bit on the manipulative side, to put it mildly.
G’day Nash,
You’ve been TAGGED! Please go to Campbell to get the details. It’s not a difficult one to do…
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